I was wondering what to blog about tonight and noticed today’s prompt on SJP is “Write a love letter to your Owner”. Quite fitting considering the mood I am in tonight.
When I first met you, I had no idea that we would become what we are today – initially, you were just “that hot guy who doesn’t pick up on hints” and then you became “that hot guy in my group who always has the answer and still doesn’t pick up on hints”. Apparently I wasn’t all that enamored by you at first :p and then it all changed that night we kissed. I still remember the butterflies in my stomach when I realised that we were dancing together…alone…and then that feeling of anticipation as my gaze lifted meet yours. I think I almost moaned in that first kiss. It was…electrifying.
After that first night, I knew I wanted to get to know you more – there was something about you that just captured my attention. Maybe it was because you were so gentle and considerate that night. Stolen kisses, hidden glances, cheeky smiles, suggestive looks…I loved every minute of it. And look where we are now eh?
I love you – as my boyfriend and as my Dominant. I love how you can be so gentle and caring but firm when I need it. I love how you can always make me feel safe, even when I’m terrified. I love how you don’t care what anyone else says about us. I love how you’re always willing to try, for my sake. I love how you always take care of me.
I know we have our ups and downs, especially when we’re away from each other but we always manage to get through them together…and what doesn’t kill us, will only make us stronger. We’ve had a bit of a rocky year so far in terms of having vast amounts of shitty incidents thrown at us…and I know that had I been alone for the ones that were thrown at me directly, I don’t think I’d be in a very good place in my head right now…so I can’t thank you enough for all the love and support you’ve given me. Yeah, I know, you’ll say that it’s your job to take care of me but still…it can’t have been easy helping me whilst having to stay strong and not let your anger boil over, lest it frighten me even more…I think you know which incident in particular I am referring to. I know I still have a way to go, but I couldn’t have made it so far without you.
I miss you – we are about halfway through the amount of time we have to spend apart this summer, with two more trips to visit each other before we get to be together again. I miss being able to sleep in your arms at night and smell your comforting scent (and your grumbles about me stealing the duvet :p ). I miss being able to look into your eyes – so full of expression – and the way your pupils dilate when you get turned on. I miss being held by you, kissing you, snuggling you. I miss biting you (with or without your permission 😉 ) and submitting to you. I miss your smile and the sound of your voice. I miss the way you lovingly dominate me and control me. I miss you. All of you.
You mean so much to me – in both senses of who you are to me and I feel very very lucky to have you. I hope you know that. If you don’t, then obviously a) I haven’t been vocal enough expressing myself; b) I haven’t left enough pawprints over your lecture notes yet; and c) kitty hasn’t been scampering around enough in your heart ;p
I love you and I can’t wait to see you again.